What is a paradigm and why would we want to shift it?
(Even if you already know, the following video is a great refresher)
In general, we can help people achieve far better progress towards what they want by helping them see things differently.
Following is a typical and powerful example you will often encounter as a coach:
Someone you are coaching is focused on improving the results in their current business
- If we help them achieve the success they are chasing
- Will this actually help them advance towards the life they’d really like to be living?
- In many cases, it won’t!
- It will just make them busier.
As Simon Sinek says: Start with Why
What if instead, the person you are coaching started by thinking about:
- How would I like to live?
- rather than
- What would I like to do?
The business or employment they then choose to pursue may be totally different from what they are currently doing.
In other words, if they start with a burning desire to become good at building a network what would this make possible?
Compared with starting with an idea and attempt to network that idea to success (or death)?
Why do people do what they currently do?
- Did they just fall into it by default?
- What was their long-term vision for their job or business when they started out?
- Did they even think about that when they started?
- Did they have an absolute passion for what they started out doing?
- If so, is that passion still as strong?
- If not, what now?
Did you notice how many questions there are above?
The best way to help people shift their paradigms is to ask them questions which help them come to their own conclusions.
We call this “questioning forward”
As a coach, you may see paradigm shifts that would greatly help the person you are coaching move toward the results they’d really like to be achieving.
- These may be possibilities they had never considered.
- Perhaps because they seemed too far out of reach.
“Questioning forward” is usually very effective in helping people to see other possibilities because the answers are coming from their mouth.
Giving people your opinion on the other hand rarely works because the words are coming out of your mouth.
Questions really are the Answers!
Helping people shift their paradigms needs to be approached carefully
Are you the best person to be doing it?
- Will they listen to you?
- Could you get another collaborator involved?
- What about sending them a recorded talk, article or link to a book?
- When is the right time to discuss a paradigm?
- Which paradigm shift should be addressed first?
What will you learn in the process of helping others to shift their paradigms?
How will the ability to shift other people’s paradigms help you in all areas of your life?
- Sure, it is a powerful skill to learn.
- However, it usually requires patience (just as it takes multiple blows with a sledgehammer before a rock cracks)
- Are you good with that?
- If you can help someone to shift their paradigms how will that benefit them and you?
The Urgent v’s The Important
- In most people lives, the “Urgent” looms large and continually lures them away from working on the important
- Continually focusing on the “Urgent” tends to create reactive habits which keep them super-busy
- Predictably 4 years from now, unless changes are made, they will still be chasing their urgent having made very little progress toward the Important.
Network Building has the power to multiply time
- For example, if a network builder has many other builders advocating for them, bringing business to them this saves them an enormous amount of time compared with trying to achieve the same results in the limited 24 hours a day they have at their disposal
- Doesn’t it make sense to place a high priority on Network Building – the thing which can multiply their time?
- How could time spent elsewhere currently be transferred to Network Building?
- For example, what if 15 minutes of television watching could be replaced with 15 minutes of “fingers to keyboard”?